Retirement and Starting Over

Hello again

Well, I have just read my friend Lyn's retirement blog. She's called it: mysagariangapyear. Boy is she having a great time. 

Off to Barbados over Easter, then to Mallorca for a month and now she has planned to go to Borneo and then Brazil. 

Travelling is one of my passions and I have to admit I am envious of her ability to do this. 

However, I had my year off last year and in that year felt drawn closer to God than at any time in my life. Since going back to work - albeit only 2.5 - 3 days a week -  I have had to be distracted from that deeper spirituality and feel the poorer for it. I worry about my increasingly critical nature, and fear it is a reflection of the frustration of my life at the moment. 

I enjoy my time in school 80% of the time, but the other 20% dominates my mind - even now, on holiday from school I think of the class and the children who give me trouble. At the same time I am grateful for the class I actually get to teach as opposed to child-mind.

I feel God called me to this place - not just to earn money, but for some other reason, but right now, I can't see why and that is an area where my critical nature is at its worst.

By rights, I should only be there for half a term more, but in practice, I may be there longer - we shall see.

For now, I wait on the Lord and trust He will show me what to do next and I ask him to take this critical nature away and make me more constructive in my opinions. 

Meanwhile, Lyn, "Bon voyage have a great time, wish I was there!"

A View from a Bridge  in St Ives, Cambs.

Christmas Peace

It’s that time of year again - a mixture between enjoyment of being with family and friends, catching up personally or via news sent through the post or email and the stress of getting everything ready, travelling hither and yon and worrying what to buy for various people. 

 

Strange, that really Christmas is meant to be the celebration of the arrival of The Prince of Peace  to our world!

 

It has made me reflect on the meaning of Peace and I wondered what it would mean to you. 

 

In global terms it often refers to lack of war - the mistaken declaration of “Peace in our time” in 1939 still rings around the world. More recently, we hear of ‘Peace talks” , marking the beginning of a conversation about granting concessions and agreement to lay down arms.

 

More sublimely, we speak of ‘peace and quiet’ - refering to a lack of noise. An escape to the country is a dream for us where we can hear nothing but the sound of the breeze or an occasional bird or sheep. That constitutes ‘quiet’, but does it really bring peace?

 

It is Isaiah who refers to the coming Messiah as ‘The Prince of Peace’ but did he foresee by that a divine ruler who would sort things out for the people of Israel - free them from their enemies, or was he refering to a new creation where ‘the lion will lie down with the lamb.....they will neither harm nor destroy in all my holy mountain” 

 

Of course Isaiah prophesied all of that and much more and for many people today in war-ravaged countries, that would be a glorious hope. But do we have to be in that situation to know true peace?

 

If you stop to consider for one moment what peace means to you, would it be those things, or would it rather be freedom from concerns that knot our stomachs - our health, finances, concern for others like our family members or close friends, worry about work and security, fear of the future.

 

Jesus actually said (Matt. 10:34) ‘I did not come to bring peace’ and went on to describe how families would be riven by those who decided to follow Jesus and those who chose not to, but he also said, ‘Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.’ (John 14:27).

 

So, I would suggest, the peace that Jesus brings is not freedom from cares and worries and war, but a gift of a trust and dependence on the Lord who is over all, a relationship with the Almighty God who allows us to represent Him and who bestows on us His image and characteristics that we might be ‘peacemakers,’ bringers of peace, messengers of joy and hope is a world that is confused and lost, a world which muddles materialism with happiness and celebrity with completeness. 

 

May you know God’s real peace this Christmas time and in the year ahead.

Dubai and Reflection of Life in a Hot Climate

I went back to work in September - just two days a week, but enough to distrupt the more relaxed way of life I enjoyed for a year. Disappointing to have to do it, but 'needs must' as they say. the school is very different to Davenant - Aveley is an area of high deprivation and the children's exam results reflect this. The Y10 are great but the Y8 are quite needy with behavioural problems and no fun to try to teach - I was never good with badly behaved kids.

However, here now in Dubai - a holiday with Bec and Iain booked long before I was to go back to work. What a different world - no deprivation here - at least not amonsgt the Emirati locals and the expat business community. Possibly a lot of deprivation amongst the immigrant servicing population, however;  the taxi drivers from Pakistan who hot-bed with their shift colleagues, the women from the Phillipines who Nanny children of the rich and famous - or just rich - or spend eleven hours a day pampering the "Jumierah Janes" - the name given to the women who live on Jumierah Palm and stay at home all day while hubby works or travels; women bored out of their minds - classic 'Desperate Housewives'

Having said that, you can understand the love of living here. Dubai is - in spite of economic down-turns - an ever growing city with the biggest mall/the tallest building/even the highest flagpole, in the world!

But it made me reflect on Psalm 8: "Lord, our Lord how majestic is thy name in all the earth" - It goes on: "When I consider your heavens,the work of your fingers, the moon and the stars which you have set in place what is mankind  that you are mindful of them, human beings that you care for them."

How the Lord must smile as He looks on our efforts to create the biggest and the best - and we do it in UK and the USA too. The mind of man is amazing - how are these structures built? What genius lies behind the construction of bridges that have to span thousands of metres - there IS beauty in some of the structures, but how much greater is our God whose mind lies behind it all, and whose concepts we cannot begin to fathom.

Eating in Málaga

While in Málaga we stopped at a tapas bar in the old centre called "Madeinterranea"  - no misprint, just clever play on a word. Great food and at a bargain price - more than the two of us could eat.

This was the taster plate:

Apple - Start

Surprise!

Well, a week from now and I'll be going back to a school! Yes, having left Davenant a year ago - in fact I received my last wage packet from that esteemed establishment one year ago today. 

So what?

In the last year, I have worked on two tv 'things' - an advert and a programee (Aircrash Investigation). I have worked in a language centre where we  role play in Spanish or French - great fun, poor pay!! I have got two lovely students through GCSE with very good results and, most importantly, I have started up a work for women called Heart2Heart -that's what I am most thrilled about.

However, needs must and I am back to teaching - albeit a maternity leave in Aveley - a very different school to Davenant with an A*-C score of 40percent. I will be the only qualified languages teacher mentoring a Teach First student from France - i.e. a Gove inspired and entitled unqualified teacher from France who will have her work cut out for her.

I was greeted as an answer to a desperate prayer and so I go wondering whether this was God's plan for me or me jumping the gun. All will soon be revealed! Can I cope with low performing students? Can I cope with the behaviour? (It may be better than I think). 

I keep feeling the kids there may actually be glad to have the chance to learn a language - I am teaching only the GCSE group and Y8. The lessons last 100mins!!! So, it will be great for covering GCSE in the time that's for sure!

Meanwhile, great excitement  -Heart2Heart is going to Sunday too. October 14th is the Sunday launch. I pray for the Lord's blessing on that. 

 

John 6: ff - Feeding the 5000 and walking on water -Amazing or what? See Paul's letter to the Ephesians Chapter 3: 21

I spoke on these chapters in two of our local churches over the last couple of weeks, some of you may like to read my talk.

How many of you switched off from concentrating when you realised what the Gospel reading was about?

I don’t mean in a dismissive way, but because it was so familiar, your mind was able to skim over it. How many of us have heard the expression “S/He walks on water” to suggest someone (human) is amazing?

The familiarity of the two stories can make us gloss over what Jesus did - he fed 5000+ people on a very meagre amount of food; he not only appeared at the side of a boat three and a half miles out in the middle of a lake, but it sounds like as soon as they took Him on board they had arrived at their destination - as the SatNav might say!!

Look at these accounts, for a minute as if you’ve never seen them before - aren’t they amazing? A few weeks ago days ago we were at a retirement bash of a very dear friend and he had arranged for a couple of entertainers to mingle with the guests while we were nibbling on some delicacies. One was a “magician” and the other was a “mind reader” . They were fantastic! It doesn’t matter how hard we looked, we could not figure out how they were doing their tricks - but that’s all they were - tricks! Even they admitted that that’s all they were - illusions.

So, these things that Jesus did, were they just illusions too? Jesus divided 2 fish and 5 loaves - thanked the Father for them and then fed 5000 and more people with enough for left overs. That could not have been slight of hand because 5000 and more people ate the food - They not only saw what he did they tasted what he produced. They were fed with enough to satisfy! Notice the details John uses to describe the scene: Philip had already observed it would take 8 months wages to feed such a crowd(v7) John made the comment that there was plenty of grass in that place for the MEN to sit down! (v10), because Bethsaida was actually a desert area. Then they gathered 12 baskets of left overs - each disciple must have grabbed a basket and done the litter pick! All the fish was eaten!!

After that and before the water walking miracle, John was careful to point out that “Jesus withdrew to the mountain by himself” (end of v15) and then again in v16, he states that the disciples set off in the boat and that Jesus had not yet joined them. The crowds again witnessed this - read v22

“The next day, the crowd that had stayed on the opposite shore of the lake realised that
only one boat had been there and that Jesus had not entered it with His disciples, but that they had gone away alone”.
The disciples were nearly 6 kms out in the lake when the wind came up - it must have been something for these experienced fishermen to be afraid, but they were,.... scared!
When Jesus walked towards them that must have scared them even more, but when he said “ Calm down it’s Me”, it says “They allowed Him in to the boat”!! Then before they knew it, they were at the shore.

Quite apart from the disciples, John points out that the crowds realised all this and followed Jesus to look for him in Capernaum, across the lake from where they had last seen Him, for in v24 we read
“Once the crowd realised that neither Jesus nor His disciples were there, they (themselves) got into the boats and went to Capernaum in search of Jesus”.

John was like an investigative barrister in court proving these things by the fact that all these people had seen them Nevertheless. Jesus challenges them when He says in v36 - “You’ve seen me, but still you don’t believe” - How ironic!!

Now let’s turn to Ephesians 3 and to hear the words of one who DID believe, even though he had not seen - Paul. In his prayer for the Ephesians beginning at v14, Paul prays that they should understand God’s love and goes on to conclude in a doxology - expression of praise to God - “Now, to Him who is able to do more than all we ask or imagine ,according to His power that is at work within us, to Him be glory in the churches and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations for ever and ever, Amen!

So 5000, heard, saw and ate, but remained skeptical, but one man heard, saw ( in his blind state) and believed and was convinced. So convinced that he became a servant of the gospel, the Good News, made him a slave to it - he could not stop sharing it!

Are we people who see God in our lives - speak of ‘miraculous’ signs or events that could ‘only be of God’ and then still say, “prove to me you exist”? Do we, nevertheless, doubt?
OR
Are we a people who have heard the Lord direct us, see Him through changed circumstances and believe in His love even at times when He may appear silent ?

....and then say ‘My Lord and my God, give me the opportunity to tell others about your love for all by sharing it with those around me and telling them the Good News of a life lived less ordinary”?

The omnipotence which God reveals in the miracles of answered prayer is not a figment of the imagination, but it is as Paul says in his prayer for the Ephesians - “in line with (according to) that mighty operation of His power that is already at work within us - so says the theologian William Hendricksen. ‘That power, called us out of darkness and brought us into the Light’.
He goes on......
‘It is God’s infinite might which He exerted when He raised, Jesus from the dead -( changed water into wine, fed 5000, caused Jesus to walk on water and still the waves - all that and more-) which is now operative in our own parallel, spiritual resurrection!’

“Therefore to the one who does not need to overly exert himself in order to fulfill our desires, but can do it with ease, be the glory in the church and in Christ Jesus” In a church it is often easy to see the ‘job’ of spreading the gospel, of ministering to those ill or in need, as that of the vicar or the people who ‘hold a position’, but Paul makes it clear here that we all, if we have a relationship with Christ should become effectively servants or administers of the Gospel - that His glory may be seen in the church -and we through the power of the Holy Spirt at work in us - continue to do great things in our lives and we have the duty - and the pleasure - to share it with the people around us.

July 2012

Quite a week!                                             

 

On Wednesday I went to the Retirement Bash of my dear friends Lyn Dowrick and Sue Howard. It seemed most of the school had turned out to say ‘Farewell and Thank you’ to these two great teachers - exemplar material, both!

   

It reminded me of how I left Davenant a year ago, with plans and hopes for the year ahead, my life ahead!

 

What has happenend? Well, perhaps not the radio work I had expected I would slot into!

 

Instead, I have worked at the Europacentre a Languages role play “village” right here in Hornchurch, a bit of tutoring, but above all and unpaid - in material terms- has been Heart2Heart - “The heart of women seeking after the Heart of God”. 

 

This Thursday was our second evening of Worship, Testimony, Teaching and Ministry for women, designed and organised by women from the Anglican Parish of Hornchurch, but intended for any and all women in the town. On our second evening more than 80 women attended - as before - but some different women, others back for more. 

 

Our speaker Lin Button spoke to us about the need to love ourselves as God loves us and not to compare ourselves with others detrimentally. Lin’s presentation style is authoritative but quiet and the effect was dynamic. Women of all ages came up to me to say it was a wonderful evening and the message had spoken to them personally and that the Holy Spirit was tangible in the room. 

 

Our worship was truly enhanced by the contribution of the wondeful Helen Yusaf from Romford Elim church. Her charismatic style, her unashamed thrill in worship and getting others to join her in it, was infectious and exciting. 

 

The theme throughout this work has been the quote from Esther, “Who knows but that you have entered the court of the King for such a time as this”. Mordecai, her uncle was refering to the court of King Xerxes of Persia, we have entered in to the court of the King of Heaven and we all believe we have come into His courts for big things to happen.

 

Enriching the lives of women in their relationship with Christ, is to enrich our families and our societies, and if my leaving teaching in Davenant was in the planning for this, then Praise God! 

 

“Because God’s worth it”!!

 

The Royal Jubilee - a Christian Perspective

 


Jubilee weekend - what an amazing show of support for the monarch. As Rolf Harris put it “An outpouring of love for our beloved Queen”

It shows what a need we have to align ourselves with human greatness. I wonder how many being present felt they were, for a short while, a part of the Royal Family. How many will say, “I was there”.

Few, it seems have been left unmoved by the heartwarming natural reflections of Prince Charles, speaking of his “Mamma” and “Mummy”, and seeing the intimate footage of the Royals at play with their young children. Lots of people would love to have an informal conversation with one of the Royal Family, and thus gain access into their inner sanctum and to declare at the end of it - “They are human”.

Of course they are!

On the 5th of June, we come, after the River Procession, the Concert, at last to give thanks to God for her 60 years’ reign. All down the Mall, they chanted “God Save the Queen”, over and over. This 86 year old lady, hard working, serene in all weathers, dutiful and dignified. Yes, she has lived a life of privilege, but always - or almost always - living under public scrutiny, held accountable for all her actions and those of her children and children’s children. A small price to pay you may say - perhaps!

Now, turn your thoughts to another King. A King who came to live among us one who truly worked and walked with common people. He lived most of His life in anonimity, only to reveal his kingship towards the end of his life after showing his friends and countrymen His love, wisdom and miraculous dynamism.

He entered Jerusalem in the last few days of life to the people’s sudden awareness and acknowledgement of his greatness if not full understanding of his Deity.

I wondered, as I heard the chant “God Save the Queen” down the Mall, was it with the same rhythmn and fervour that they shouted “Hosanna” to Jesus?

The Archbishop of Canterbury speaks of the Queen ‘dedicated to the Will of God’. How wonderful to know this is not just a pleasantry, and that she is truly a woman of God who has always been aware of her calling. The difference between our Queen Elizabeth II and our King Jesus is that, yes, she is fully human, He too, was fully human but also was and still is, fully Divine.

After the praise and addulation of the crowds, the Queen will return to her palace and her life of duty and extraordinary benefit and favour. Jesus remained with his friends for a few days before giving up everything on the cross, less than seven days later.

Hugh Edwards refered this morning to the crowds’ ‘obsession with royalty’. if only the same crowds would have an obsession with the Divine Royalty - this country would show joy, goodwill and neighbourlyness for far more than just a long weekend. But for now, “God save the Queen” !

Victor Meldrew or Concerned Citizen?

 

 

Being an ex-teacher of secondary school students, I am not afraid of speaking to young adolescents - or older ones come to that, so last night as I was crossing the exit road from our local Sainsbury carpark only to have a young man drive into it in the wrong direction, I wasted no time in putting them right. 

The young man who was driving a very nice Audi saloon, opened his window and told me to worry about my own life and not to worry about his. At least he didn't tell me to f-off!

It actually made me question my involvement and think that maybe I shouldn't concern myself with other people's rule or law breaking. After all, why should I get worked up when I see  our local bad boy fishing in our local pond, sitting practically next to the sign that clearly demands "No fishing". 

Furthermore, why should I care about the kids jumping over the park fence at night, lighting a fire, killing a cygnet (probably by accident) and leaving litter all over the grounds? After all, the park keeper needs a job and it's his job to clear the litter. Why should I alert the local police about the regular drug drops we see going on? There might be retribution as  a result, and it's the job of the local schools to teach about drug awareness, if kids then go to buy drugs, well it's their life - not mine.

The police have a hard job. Their numbers are reduced and their role in the community constantly undermined by allegations of racism, ineffectiveness and corruption. However, I know that many are trying to do a decent job to keep law and order in the towns where they work and live, bringing up the next generation while protecting the frail, the vulnerable and the elderly. Do they have to do it alone?

If we worry only about our own concerns and allow petty law breakers to do as they wish, the parameters of our society will so shift that we will lose sight of the moral compass that forms a basis of our community order. 

It may cost me my dignity when I am told where to go by some defensive youngster, but somehow I feel that 'Victor Meldrews" like myself - with 'One foot in the Grave' need to speak up when we see selfish individuals walking all over the rules and laws which allow our society to run more smoothly. They may not all seem to suit the indivual, but when considered from a corporate point of view, most rules which govern our society do make sense.

Please let me know how you feel.